My Year of Healing

Healing, it has been said, is a matter of time.  “Time heals all wounds.”  In some ways it is a matter of time.  If you get a minor cut or a scrape, it generally is a matter of time before it heals.  However minor, though, that injury still requires a little work to heal.  You probably need to clean and disinfect the wound.  You might need to put a bandage on it.  More serious injuries might require therapy of some sort.  In the end most of them leave scars.

Emotional injuries are no different.  A lost love, the death of someone close, being emotionally hurt by someone also causes physical pain.

“But activity in areas linked with physical pain, such as the somatosensory cortex and the dorsal posterior insula, also increased during these tasks. The results suggested that social and physical pain have more in common than merely causing distress — they share sensory brain regions too.” (Eric Jaffe – Observer Vol.26, No.2 February, 2013 Association of Psychological Science). 

So the injury caused by loss or other trauma is very real.  It is physical.

The past year and a quarter, for me, has been about healing.  At first, I tried to ignore the hurt, but it really was a gaping, bleeding wound.  On top of it all, I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, the foundations of which were probably laid  years ago.  I was a physical and emotional wreck.  I was spiritually spent.  The well was dry.

Then I met a Native American spiritual leader who has become a very good friend.  I then met a couple of the tribe’s elders who are two of the most amazing and powerful women I have ever met.  I found a good counselor at the same time.   The spiritual leader taught me how to meditate and how to contact my spirit guides.  That is where the work began.  I suppose we could call it therapy.  What it really turned out to be was radical change. All of my preconceived notions and beliefs were turned upside down.  The spiritual leader taught me about spirits, how spirits are and how to communicate with them.   My understanding about religion and spirituality has been completely turned on it’s head.   The bleeding stopped.

So what kind of work have I done?  A lot of reading to start with.  I’ve spent some time meditating and talking to my spirit guides and sought their help.  I spent a lot of time listening to and learning from others in groups called TEA’s.

I spent a lot of time out riding my motorcycle.  As much as I would have liked to share that experience with someone, I’m glad that I did it alone.  It became a spiritual time for me and my camera was always with me.

I spent many a morning from December to May taking pictures of the sunrises at Pine Point Beach and learned why Winslow Homer lived out on Black Point.  It was also a very spiritual experience.

Sunrise from Pine Point Maine Spring 2013

I photographed 3 weddings.  I met many, many very beautiful, spiritual people from all walks of life along the way.  I went on a shamanic journey of the Munay Ki and received the 9 rites.  It was a journey that I nic-named “the magical mystery tour.”  I learned much about myself.  I learned how to connect with Mother Earth (Pachamama).  I learned about energy and how we are all connected.  I continue to learn.  I hiked with people I thought were strangers that turned out to be friends of friends.  How cool was that?

I reconnected with my family.  I met my grandson for the first time.  I reconnected with my youngest daughter.  I got out of my comfort zone.  I’ve decided to get out of high tech when the time is right.

The biggest thing part of the work of healing has been learning to go inside of myself.  To face up to the good and not so good things that make up who I am.  To face up to the pain.  To face up to my mistakes.  To face my past and to no longer let it rule my future.  I’ve learned to listen to my intuition.  I’m making smarter choices  I know that my path is very different from what and where it was.  I’ve learned to let go.

I’m not the man I was and that is OK.  I’ve become more of the man that I like.  I am at a point where I am happy.  Life isn’t perfect.  It never will be, but I’m happy with where I am for the moment.  But life isn’t static.  I continually changes.  I don’t know where the path leads.  The path I’m on is not the path I was on when this process started.  I have a path to share.  I have a life that I’d love to share.  Moment to moment, I’m happy.

Like a physical injury might need physical therapy, Emotional and spiritual injures require emotional and spiritual therapy.  Do I have scars from it?  Sure I do.  They are exquisite reminders of where I’ve been.

If you have been hurt or suffered heartbreak.  I can sympathize.  But to get over the hurt, you have much work ahead of you.  Go inside yourself.  Face that pain.  Face up to and clean out the past.  Shed your past like the serpent sheds it’s skin.  Learn from your mistakes.  Forgive yourself and forgive whoever caused the pain.  Let go.  Trust your spirit guides.  Above all, be grateful for the experience.  It may not seem like it, but you have abundance all around you.  Be grateful for it.  Be grateful for all the little things because together, they add up to big things.  Your light will start to flicker on again and over time and with a lot of work, it will shine brightly again.

My life is blessed.  I’m so grateful for it.  I’m grateful for the people in it.  I’m grateful for all of the help that I’ve received along the way.  To all of those people, should you read this, thank you.

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